An Undisguised Rant

U of C students have no sense of Chicago's geography. We think in terms of El stops, not neighborhoods, because anywhere we go is a train ride away. We call Lakeview "Belmont", because the Red Line stop is "Belmont". Of course, this is also the CTA's fault. A lot of things are the CTA's fault, but I'll limit myself to the naming of stations. Before they recently created the Pink Line by renaming part of the Blue Line the Pink Line, there were two stops on the Blue Line called "California", and three called "Western". See, the names refer to the cross-streets. The problem is that the three branches of the Blue Line crossed California Ave twice and Western three times. Then, of course, the Green Line also crosses California, so there's a California stop on the Green Line as well. There's a Chicago stop (yes, in Chicago there's a street named "Chicago") on the Blue, Brown, and Red lines, as well as an Addison on the Blue, Brown and Red, and a 47th street stop on the Green and Red. There are two Grands, several Ciceros, and a couple Irving Parks, neither of which is near Irving Park (which I haven't been able to find).

This is all just to say that U of C students, when they mean "Wicker Park", the neighborhood near very small park of the same name, they say "near the Damen Blue Line stop." Which is where I am. At Filter, a trendy coffee shop on the North Side.

Filter used to be a real coffee shop where people went to read and write and talk. Now, as one of my teachers says, it's a place where people go to look like they're writing so that hipsters will hit on them. But, Gourmand was closed, and Bourgeois Pig was not an option, so Filter it was.

See, there are no good coffee shops in Hyde Park. None. The Med's "coffee shop" has four, yes four, tables, and you can't get food to eat there. Third World Cafe is ok, but it's often slow, the seating is not great, and it closes at the ridiculously early hour of 7:30. Plus the music is very soft-rock. Istria is ok, except it's pretty far from campus, it's small, and the decor they chose could be described as "operating-room meets Ikea", all colors and stainless steel. In any case, they don't have any couches or comfortable chairs.

Like so many things related to student life, the University has to manufacture coffee shops. They heavily subsidize several on campus, including Einstein's Bagels. However, though I have doubts about the Econ dept. here, they are right on one thing: if people don't have an incentive to do their jobs, they won't do them. The service is often poor, and with good reason: I wouldn't work hard if I was getting 7 bucks an hour with no possibility of advancement. Most of the "student-run" coffee shops close before 5. Of the two that stay open late-ish, one, in the library, is not even a real coffee shop. The other, Uncle Joe's AKA Hallowed Grounds, is the closest thing to what I need: they have decent coffee (now, at least), couches, and lots of seating. However, their music is awful for working. Even when the music is good, the click-clacking coming from the three pool tables is terribly distracting. The furniture is falling apart, and not in a good way, and outlets are inconveniently located and often don't work.

And so, I, like many U of C students, must leave campus to find a chill work environment. That is why I am at filter, sitting next to two guys who are evidently working on a movie. One guy, who looks 30 or 35, talks and dresses like he's 20. Then, for some reason there are lots of kids running around. And some UIC kids who sat a few seats away from each other but insist on having a discussion, to the annoyance of the people unluckily sitting between them.

Now, to a great extent, the lack of coffee shops and other retail options is the fault of the university itself. When the Music Box, a great indie cinema on the North Side offered to buy the old movie theater that has been closed for a number of years, the University, which owns the building, said no. They didn't want to threaten the Max Palevsky Cinema located in Ida Noyes Hall. The University has its own barber, its own pub, its own hotel, and its own convenience store (which is poorly run - atrociously run). All of these push out external entrepreneurs. This is the home of economic liberalism, but Bart Mart, the only thing on campus or near campus open after 12 (except the aforementioned Uncle Joe's), is a university-sanctioned monopoly. Any econ prof here could tell you that the effects of that would be undersupply as the monopolist earns economic profits. Well, Bart Mart is always understaffed and understocked, not to mention overpriced. And the University, which owns practically everything around campus, doesn't allow another convenience store to open up nearby and offer better service and better prices. Perhaps the U of C needs to start practicing what it preaches.